I should have……

A popular misconception is that someone who is strong on the outside….someone who is firm on their code that they live by, unwavering, and often misunderstood…isn’t actually one of the people most likely to be the one to possess the heart of a lion…and be the one who wants great things for you, and is praying for your every happiness.
At some point in our lives, if we’re lucky, the events of our lives let us know how to be strong and when to make the strength rise to the surface to help us endure a bump in the road….and then, that it is okay to let that go for a while
Every holiday season…..I am especially reminded of the family that has passed….all the faces and voices that sat around the table to feast…that gathered in the kitchen to bake cookies or wash dishes…or to fall asleep in front of the football game on T.V. while the snow gently falls outside on a chilly New England day.  Most of them are gone now. Only a few remain, and even fewer speak to each other.  I battle myself with the fact that, at 52 ( a young 52), I serve in a Mediterranean style restaurant overlooking the Pacific Ocean.  The battle…..the physicality of it at my age and those ‘in the heat of battle’ moments that restaurants are known for.  Then I think…..get over that quickly dear….embrace the fact that you CAN.  The environment that I sometimes curse also can be a blessing in disguise….the energy of my younger counterparts and their weddings and babies over the years…..the restaurant guests that visit on the holidays and provide me with a contemporary alternative to that of days gone by, at least for a little while.
Someone like me….do not pity….that is unacceptable.  Admire the creative thinking and encourage others to remember, always, past years of love and that the future years are a canvas to paint , a new song to sing, or a new chapter to write.
Keep your ‘short list’ of valuables on speed dial to check in…we must never lose touch with those that matter for too long.  Never allow your self to hang your head in regret and say…I should have.

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